Welcome . . .
These 268 pages (all cross referenced, and comprehensively indexed), come complete with the massage DVD. It all works!!! Heather has condensed of experience in common sense, practical wisdom and clinical research across several different health care modalities in this one manual. This book is a manual for dads, mums and their partners – and for midwives and doulas – and anyone who is interested in maternal comfort and making the baby making process easier leading to better babies and bonded families. For Dad-to-be, it is equivalent of a ’glove box’ manual for his wife/woman – not his car. Written in a format that is full of diagrams, easy to follow, it covers the stages of maternity and all the common complaints – complete mum and baby care – from a natural and traditional healing perspective. Nothing like it out there!! Practical reasons behind what may be ‘going wrong’ and how to have it turn around to be ‘going right’.
A revolutionary new style of health care aimed at couples helping themselves.
It is designed with the pregnant, (or even the as yet unpregnant, but trying couple, in mind.
Me (Heather)- I sincerely wish I had had this with me whilst I was growing my babies. It would have made an extraordinary difference to my life as a new mother and even for me in my body now.
I wrote it so others did not have such trials I encountered in doing what should come so naturally – having easy pregnancies, better births, easy babies and a bonded life with the dads of my children.
A message from a birth worker – The most important part of this work is that it is positive. Dad instead of not knowing what to do, has a guide, and can be incredibly useful. When dad has been practicing at home, when in labour he is such a valuable asset as he takes the place of an epidural – they have danced this act before – she trusts him, he knows what to do and it all just flows. Beautiful!!! Liz, Brisbane
From a midwife – I was given Heather’s book at the end of a couple’s last pregnancy – they had had two difficult births and then found What Dads Can Do – it transformed their lives at the last birth was a joy. They were so grateful they wanted me to have their copy so I could share it about. Thanks Heather” Ruth, Greymouth.
Another midwife – Heather’s manual gives the couple a sense of empowerment. There is always a reason behind things happening and whilst my training may say otherwise, whenever I have a couple use her work, often apparently ‘high risk’ problems always reduce, leaving the birth a more likely natural event. The pelvic opening massage and the use of moxa has revolutionized the way labour plays out for those especially previously plagued with structural pain and inability to sleep comfortably. Yvonne, NZ
Heather has been providing natural health care to pregnant women for more 42 years. These 268 pages (all cross referenced, and comprehensively indexed), come complete with the massage DVD. It all works!!! Heather has condensed of experience in common sense, practical wisdom and clinical research across several different health care modalities in this one manual.
Mums . . .
“I wish every woman could have a copy of this book. I have used it so many times now I don’t leave home without it, just in case I should come across a pregnant woman. It has helped me understand how to keep my body in balance emotionally and physically, and it validates my own intuitions time and time again. All those conditions people will tell you are ‘common’ – I have known in my heart are actually symptoms of my body asking for help, asking me to change in some way, heal in some way. Finally now with ‘What Dads Can Do’ I have found a manual to show me HOW to change; HOW to heal; that my instincts are valid and my baby deserves the attention it is requesting through my body. My partner and I have successfully referred to this book and it’s detailed, step by step instructions for myself, and friends many times – prenatal massage, constipation, digestive upsets, nausea and post-birth internal scarring. ‘I experienced a threatened miscarriage at 17 weeks, and with guidance from Heather through this book – we put into action with simple techniques, and a faith in my body’s ability to heal itself, all was well. This book is detailed, accurate and practical and I cannot recommend it highly enough to parents, midwives, doctors and anyone in contact with pregnant women”. If I worried about something I would go to the book to see if I should be worried or not. I would always find what bothered me covered in it, and Heather never said – ‘don’t worry’ or ‘go to your doctor’ – she always said what was happening and what to do to bring myself back into balance. What a resource!! I never found a question unanswered!!! I always came away happy and knowing what I could do to help myself”. Kerrie, Vict
On Heather’s suggestion, my husband put me on the toilet sitting backwards and rubbing my back every time there was a contraction and it was great. He was so busy and attentive it really felt like we were in this together. I couldn’t have asked for a better birth partner and father and husband but next time we have a baby I would listen to him an little more and not worry if I was upsetting the hospital staff…Gloria, Brisbane
“I had Heather’s book, “What Dad’s Can Do” by the bed, and whenever I needed some information, validation or reassurance, I had a look. If I was awake worrying at 2am – WDCD always came up with why things were happening, and what I had done to contribute, and what to do to undo whatever it was. All other pregnancy books said ‘don’t worry’ or ‘see your doctor’. This book gave us instant explanations and the answers and they all worked!” Rebecca, Brisbane
Parents
‘After being told at out of the blue 37 weeks she was ‘too old’ to birth naturally and that she would need a C section next week . . .we took your advice and investigated the natural and real birthing options still available in the public system. Prior to my wife going into labour, I did the massages to the sacrum and buttocks. It was a useful way to prepare for the birth. Although the labour was induced she did not take any pain relief, nor was proglastin applied due to the cervix had to begun to dilate. I put this down on your advice to go public (they sacked their obstetrician) and making us more aware that it is quite normal to go over the forty-week cycle. I found that your advice was invaluable in assisting me to give the support that my wife required in the birth of our son. I applied the pressure at the points that you indicated, and this gave her relief during the contractions. Being able to offer an alternative to medical pain relief as well as acting as an advocate for natural and safe for baby whilst my wife was not in a position to do it herself made me realise the positive role I could play in the birth of our child. Thank you so much for assisting me in playing such a vital and positive role in supporting my wife birth our baby herself. Paul, Brisbane
‘What Dads Can Do’ is such a wealth of things to do in all stages of pregnancy and afterwards – not just a labour help. “Invaluable when I had had baby and did not know what to do – there was always something to do” Emma, Brisbane
“My husband found the book very good, especially after baby was born. In the first few weeks after her birth he really focused his attention on making a beautiful environment for us as a family, and my time to bond with her and to rest my body. He also found the book really useful when I suffered a bout of mastitis in her third week. It helped both of us understand the importance of rest, rest and more rest! Thanks for a great resource. The index in the back is particularly useful, as are the page references throughout”. Lyndal, Brisbane
We were well into the moxa and massage a couple of times a week. My husband would put the same CD on each time, and oil me up for what could have passed for torture. (Funnily enough, it is this same CD that now brings baby back down to earth if he is uptight or upset in the car). The use of moxa, and its effects on me must have been greater than we thought at the time for him to have this reaction to the music.) My backside was a series of bruises, but at the same time, as the weeks passed, the pain lessened and each massage was teaching me more about my body, pain thresholds and how to manage. We used ‘What Dad’s Can Do’ as our point of reference for everything, particularly as by this stage, I was fairly preoccupied with the concept of labour – what would it be like? How was it possible and is it ever going to happen? The advice that Heather has given us has been logical and without risk. It all came down to changing our point of reference. Health and naturally doing it for ourselves. Tricia, Sydney
“In the quiet moments of early morning I now breastfeed our baby girl and reflect on how thankful I am of Heather Bruce, because previously, for the past 2 years, I woke to my period every 28 or 29 days. A rush of sadness, frustration and disappointment would linger for a few days, then I would start looking forward to day 14 (approximately) and hope that maybe this month I would conceive. Though I’d heard of secondary infertility I wasn’t convinced that was the problem. My doctor run some tests, all came back normal, she concluded with “you just need to forget about getting pregnant, then it will happen”. At 39 and after trying for 2 years I was not about to accept her advice, in fact I was furious. At that peak of frustration I discovered Heather. I recall being quite distressed during that first appointment; feelings of great sadness as I remembered the disappointment I had felt over our 4 year old’s hospital birth with intervention (I had always wanted a water birth) and the postnatal depression which followed. On leaving Heather’s clinic that day a feeling of joy and relief met me and I felt with certainty that given a few months of healing we would have another child. Closely following Heather’s instructions on supplements and Chinese herbs and with several more acupuncture treatments, I conceived just 2 months later. ‘My focus was now on the growing baby and preparing for a home birth. After 9 months of regular acupuncture treatments, herbs, vitamins and supplements it was finally time to fill the birth pool. During the 39th week of pregnancy 2 critical things happened. First, Heather and my husband successfully moved the baby into the optimal birthing position (my husband following Heather’s DVD and her book “What Dads Can Do”. Second, my husband and I saw a video of a water birth at home and understood how ‘easy’ natural child birth should be. With our 2 midwives attending, my husband ‘caught’ our daughter in the birthing pool under the lights of our Christmas tree. Thank you Heather for your wisdom and dedication to women’s health, because of which we now have the child we waited for and a happy Mummy”. Gaylene Greymouth NZ
(DAD) “I could not believe that my wife could look as ecstatic as the woman we saw on that beautiful birthing DVD we watched a week before – it was everything and more that we could ever have hoped for!! After all she went through after our son’s birth, this was just magic!! So was me being able to do something useful. Thank you for giving us our daughter”. Mark, Greymouth, NZ
Having Heather’s “What Dads Can Do” manual and “WDCD – Massage and Birthing” DVD has been really fantastic. It meant in the weeks leading up to our daughter’s birth we were relaxed and confident and very comfortable!! A dad’s view – Heather’s groundwork leading up to the birth of our daughter not only prepared her mum physically for birthing but also it gave me the confidence to assist her. The massage techniques in labour and the reassurance I felt during the birth event that everything was progressing as nature intended was fantastic. All of this resulted in the home birth of our first child without intervention into the peaceful and loving environment- a joyous event – not directed by strangers. My wife experienced ecstatic birth and there was no hint of depression – she was high for days after doing it all herself. – Chris, Brisbane
The labour was wonderful with pretty much all of it at home with Steve being an absolute rock doing continuous massage /moxa etc from your wonderful book. Our beautiful boy – all 11 lb 1 oz of him – was so much easier to birth than his 9lb sister – I had to get cut to get her out – all that massage/moxa meant that I only have a wee tear that doesn’t warrant stitches, Your book has been a godsend, thank you Heather, I have really appreciated it. Diane, Greymouth, NZ
‘I can’t believe how the massage and moxa have sorted out the back and neck tension. At this stage of pregnancy to be able to sleep again is amazing!! The baby is moving around now (trying to get into right position) and I feel so much more comfortable. As soon as my husband comes home, he has work to do – and it has completely eased up the back problems I thought were due to just being pregnant. Thank you so much!!! ‘ Carol, Wilston, Brisbane
Anthony’s gut. On Thursday night I got out WDCD and turned to the section on the gut …read up about the points and the massage I could do and got to it. Now, Anthony is a skeptic and not fully “with” me on the whole natural remedies thing but he agreed to let me do my thing (or your thing actually). Anyway did the back massage top and bottom and then got into massaging points ST 37, 39 and 40 and then TH 6. Well, within 20 minutes I asked him how his stomach was feeling and he replied it was actually feeling so much better – amazing!!!! I was blown away – I touched the points again where I had massaged (like you do with me) and he was amazed that they weren’t hurting anymore and neither was his gut. I got the slippery elm – he’s taking it twice a day in yoghurt with honey and he’s taking a probiotic and his zinc and C and his stomach hasn’t burned or ached since. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU…The instructions were easy to read, understand and do and clearly not just for mums. – Michelle, Brisbane
BIRTHING – WHAT DADS CAN DO – “Heather Bruce, naturopath and acupuncturist, starts this DVD with the statement that labour and birth are not meant to be painful. Pain is an indication of blockages (emotional/physical) and the whole idea behind involving men in the birthing process and ensuring that the lines of communication remain open between partners is to minimise the blockages which can end up making birth painful. An amazing statement – especially in our Judeo-Christian society where we have been taught that the pain of childbirth is a punishment put upon women because of Eve’s ‘sin’ in the Garden of Eden.
Whether you believe that the pain is necessary or not, Heather makes an interesting point about why some people seem to suffer more than others and why it is so important for men to be involved every step of the way. Too often, men are made to feel excluded from the process of having a baby. Heather believes that men have a very important role to play in supporting their partners throughout pregnancy and in labour itself. This DVD discusses how that supportive role can be achieved and why it is so vital that women go into birth cleansed of emotional baggage so that they can open up to the new life waiting to emerge into the world.
You do NOT need to be a health professional to understand what Heather discusses and the ideas she shares. It does help however to pay close attention to her tips and to hopefully watch this DVD a couple of times before trying it out yourself. I found myself taking notes and I’ve already had my children! This is a hands-on presentation which will make many men, who can feel a bit helpless when it comes to understanding what their partner is going through, more comfortable and involved which should make both parties a lot happier. This DVD played easily and the sound and picture quality was good.” Meryl Informed Voice, Australia, October 2005
More parents’ stories
“I was six months pregnant when I saw Heather’s “What Dads Can Do” book in a bookshop. It was exactly the kind of information I’d been looking for, but, when I saw the price, I thought “can I afford this?” I then thought – “can I afford not to?” I was 39 years old, and this was my first and possibly last baby, and I wanted to make the birth experience as good as possible. This book has all that I had been looking for, and not found anywhere else. As I bought it, I can now say it was worth every cent. My husband wasn’t going to be at the birth, so my friend and I read the book, watched the DVD and followed the steps as outlined. We did the massage sequence once weekly, until baby arrived. At 37 weeks, we found that baby was breech. Following Heather’s recipe my friend and husband followed the steps outlined, and baby turned. At 40 weeks and 4 days, I went into labour and 12 hours later, without medical pain relief, I birthed a healthy daughter, 8lbs 9 oz. I wouldn’t change anything about my birthing experience, and I attribute that largely to the knowledge and preparation given to me through Heather’s very useful birth preparation tools. – Liz, NZ
I have no doubt that the techniques that you went through with my wife in the lead up were critical in giving us the pleasant birthing experience we had. I felt very much more empowered to help my wife through the contractions. This as opposed to the first time around…standing off to one side hoping it would all be over soon. The techniques you passed on really assisted her through the pain and helped to keep her relaxed. Our first birth lasted 33 hours in labour with a constant reliance on gas and pethidine shots, followed by an epidural and a forceps delivery. In contrast, this time round we were in labour 1hr 45mins, No gas, No pethidine and by the time an epidural was ordered, there wasn’t enough time for it to take effect. As such we look back with joy on the whole process. We hope that more people will make an effort to prepare for the birth via these types of options. It makes the whole day a far more pleasant and less stressful experience that you feel you have some control over, rather than leaving it up to whoever happens to be in the labour ward at the time. – Matthew, Brisbane
“The pressure points you showed me were invaluable – in the early stages of contractions, the lowest points cut straight through the contractions – almost totally removing the pain. It was wonderful to have something that simple yet that effective that I could do to help my wife birth our son. Thank you for your advice and help, as it was invaluable in giving her the confidence to birth her baby naturally”. Daniel, Red Hill, Brisbane
(DAD) “I felt that with this, our second child, we were both a lot more prepared, as we had practiced going through the labour dance together so many times. Using the DVD and following the instructions in the manual was so easy. I also felt that my wife was much more ready to accept my suggestions, and assistance, and this made me feel really useful and able to contribute more of myself”.
With this birth, I felt a lot more relaxed going in, as although bub was breech, I felt that we were more clear with our plan, so I knew that whatever happened, we were in the right place so that there wouldn’t be the rush to make a decision re Caesar like there was with our first child, I also felt a lot more part of the labour process, as I was needed to give support in the water, and I also felt that Irene was a lot more receptive to me giving that support. I think she was more relaxed about the process also” – David, Samford, Brisbane.
‘What Dads Can Do’ was an essential tool for our home birth. The DVD helped give me a clear understanding of how (& where) to massage and Moxa. The book had an answer for every question that I had and made me much more comfortable and confident about birthing at home. Not only did the book provide vital information about massage, energy flow and birth, reading this brought me even closer to my wife Catherine in the weeks before and during the birth. Matt, Brisbane
(MUM) “With our second baby, although we knew she was breech again, we were a lot more in tune with the labour process, not stressed about what would happen next. We were both focused on the baby, as we had had all that time when he was massaging and using moxa, to actually tune into the baby and our future with him. Labour actually started after a birth preparation session, and I felt really ready for the contractions”. Irene, Samford
As an acupuncturist and a Childbirth Educator and having worked with expectant couples and new parents on both sides of the Tasman, I am confident that Heather’s work can and will make a difference in the wonderful world of birth. The techniques outlined by Heather are a current take on ancient wisdom, in a readily accessible package for anyone, regardless of their previous knowledge of either birth or acupuncture. I especially appreciate Heather’s attention to referencing and cross-referencing her work, thus enabling the reader to quickly go to the part of the book they need with a minimum of effort. Her work will be of interest not only to couples but also to other health professionals with an interest in facilitating natural childbirth. Paddy, Nelson, NZ
As an acupuncturist…………………..
When I first graduated, I felt I knew all about pregnancy and was therefore well prepared for it myself. I was confident about all the points to use in any situation – eg. morning sickness, induction, breech, prolonged labour, bleeding etc. Personally experiencing pregnancy and labour did not at all match the theory I had studied. For me, Western medical interventions totally overrode the subtleties I was used to in TCM. At 42 weeks, I was booked in for an induction based on numbers, not mine and the baby’s health, which caused MUCH STRESS. No matter how many theoretical inducing points I used, I needed the emotional support (something not mentioned in my obstetrics classes). The labour was very difficult and again, no amount of TCM theory would help – I needed support and felt helpless in the sterile hospital world of machines. Again, this was not taught during my studies. At this crucial time, we needed practical information, not text-book cases in black and white. (ie. Something akin to ‘What Dad’s Can Do’!) My ideal birth was impeded by time restrictions and both the baby, and myself nearly died. I had a big haemorrhage and went into shock. I told my husband to press Spleen 1, to stop bleeding, which had a strong effect and the Doctor said that saved me from requiring a hysterectomy! The baby was given 48 hours of antibiotics, which gave her thrush and a skin rash and I did not see her for the first 12 hours – so much for bonding! All this was very traumatic – so when I discovered I was pregnant with number two, I had a strong experience of morning sickness. Again, my TCM theory simply had no effect and my nausea would not abate. I was distraught with discomfort and didn’t know why. Luckily, some friends lent us ‘What Dads Can Do’ and I consequently came to see Heather. She suggested the trauma of my first labour was a cause of the nausea, and the invasion of the cold when I was in post partum shock. Of course! I thought. How practical and useful and a simple explanation. Heather cupped my navel, which was very intense but highly effective – unfortunately, something else that we did not learn at college. After the cupping and associated moxa, my nausea subsided considerably. I took Chinese herbs and Kalianna’s Birth Trauma Essences. All were very helpful, but I was still worried about going back to hospital. Our copy of ‘What Dad Can Do’ was very WELL READ. The DVD is so easy to follow – all that moxa and massage – just for me!! Lucy, Brisbane
What husband says
My experience of the first birth was very intellectual so now (that we have the book ‘What Dads Can Do’), it is a complete relief to have a ‘living map” explaining how men can help the mothers’ body to naturally wake up. I feel empowered and so much better equipped – far more confident to deepen our relationship with the coming birth. The book has brought me out of my head and into the user-friendly diagrams with clear as a mirror wording – Matt, Brisbane
Midwife speaking on all of my work
“I’ve been a midwife since 1980. I have practiced midwifery in many different settings. I first met Heather around 2004 in Brisbane thru the Home Birth Group. I was practicing as a home birth midwife. Below is a list of many different things that I saw as changes in the health of women that Heather and I were caring for at that time.
- Ease with which these women gave birth.
( women with a history of long slow painful labours giving birth in 2-3 hours or less without drugs for pain relief) - Correct positioning of baby giving rise to easier births.
Better positioning of transverse babies or unstable lie with grand multi para - Turning of breech babies
(or easier labours for women who choose to birth their breech babies vaginally) - Change in symptoms of women with many serious conditions
eg Pre-eclampsia, polyhydramnious, oligohydramnious, cholestasis of pregnancy, Gestational diabetes of pregnancy, placental problems like low fetal growth, high fetal growth, twins, pelvic or backache of pregnancy, morning sickness, or nausea thru out pregnancy, essential hypertension. Many of these women improved so much they still were able to birth at home safely. - Post birth – easier and safer birthing of placentas.
- How to stop or control bleeding post birth without drugs.
- Improved healing for any damaged perineums especially for 3rd and 4th degree tears.
- Outcomes for subsequent pregnancies much better with more holistic healing
- Better outcomes for women with depression, both antenatally and postnatally.
- Improved baby and mother attachment
leading to much improved health for mother and baby postnatally, better breast feeding
‘To achieve these things it has meant some small changes in practice. No breaking rules of our profession. I spend much more time on diet and lifestyle. I have stopped using cold on perineum’s or breasts. Using heat you achieve great outcomes right when you want them plus better for long term health. Using Moxa sticks and massage on mothers sacrum and back.
‘Heather runs courses for midwives which help them learn how to be able to assist women to have much more enjoyable pregnancies and births. I have been incorporating different things in my practice, like no cold, better education about their bodies, better able to understand their bodies, encouraging women to take responsibility for their own and their children’s health, being patience with nature and allowing the women’s body to birth the baby and the placenta themselves. Using Moxa sticks and massage and teaching dads to help their partners to achieve the great birth they are wanting to have. Almost zero induction rate, 90% homebirth rate with no drugs, only non pharmaceutical pain relief, occasional tears, no episiotomy rate, 95% + breast feeding rate, minimal 3rd day blues, only occasional post natal depression and by far almost 100% women who love their labour and want to repeat it.
‘What I have found is, working with Heather, I been able to get a much more enjoyable practice, with giving women a much more healthy pregnancy, birth and post natal period even when working with higher risk women.
‘Heather is extremely passionate about helping women to birth naturally and what’s more to enjoy their birth. Her focus is not only on what is best for both mother and baby but also the whole family. Differing to other health professionals, she has incorporated many different health modalities to be able to give women a much more complete healing for both mothers and babies that put them in a fantastic place of complete health. Her book “What Dads Can Do”. This is a great tool to help with what, where, why and when you can do to keep Mum in optimum health throughout her whole pregnancy as well as postnatal period and on into her active family life, into menopause and old age”. Yvonne , Australia